It has never come to me seriously until I hear about a friend who decided to take a break from everything, to travel around the world. I only think and sort of drool over this thought whenever I read travel blogs and the experiences of the people who had done it. And hearing it from a friend had given me the “Eureka” moment (and really tons of inspiration) to save, take risk (and a lot of encouragement), in order to travel.
She was relating to us how she and her boyfriend (jonistravelling.com) came up with the decision - the struggles, confusion and the issues that have surfaced from the differing perspective that an individual might have vis-a-vis environment and culture. On the individual level, there is a struggle of self-preservation (avoidance of getting hurt from a possibility of a failed risk) and assurance of embarking into a new phase of her life, now shared with another person that hopefully would be there for long-term.
The environment factor involved the people around her, specifically her family. With a culture of “family closeness” and quite general (or should I say specific?) trajectory of marriage and settling down in our culture, she was caught in a dilemma of trying to explain to her loved ones that “traveling” could be a life goal, not necessarily a waste of time and resources but could be a source of self-fulfillment and actualization. Secondly, there was the fear of what kind of relationship her partner could offer to her — the question of sincerity, stability and longevity of the relationship. “When are you getting married?” “What happen next after your travel?…” are the common questions that she had to deal with.
This “leaving everything behind” dilemma and how she thought over things quite let me realise few things that sometimes we tend to think but not seriously be able to ponder on, until faced with the reality of their existence. “How do we define self-actualisation?” Is it really defined by a linear progression of individuals, i.e. do good in school, graduate with a degree and flying colors, have a good and stable job and save for the “future” (here I assume, is future family?). Could “parting away” from this natural progression of career life can’t be considered as a normal way of achieving self-fulfillment? What if after graduation, one would not like to work his degree out, and do a different thing? And in this case, what if one saves up for his or her “future,” not for financial security but because of the wanting to go around the world, meet new people and experience different cultures?
On the other hand, settling down with someone has somehow been seen to be typically done in certain way for different cultures or would “naturally” follow a step-by-step procedure as well. I actually agree on this but however would term it more as setting and conquering “milestones” together rather than having a checklist. I got this from an article shared by Joe to me a couple of days ago.
It is a good read which tackles that relationship should be a decision made by two people that know the advantages and disadvantages of their actions. If couple decides to stay together, then it should not be because of reasons of convenience, or pure economics but with the intention that it is something that would strengthen the relationship and that it is a chosen path for settling down together for a longer term. This also goes with every relationship milestone like engagement or marriage. However, for some people, they set these goals/milestones that might be different from the usual track towards marriage — the most important thing is it is a conscious and a deliberate decision that couples make.
Going back to my friend example, she and her boyfriend decided that traveling is one of their life goals, a way to strengthen their relationship, and definitely a milestone towards a long-term relationship.
Such an inspiration indeed! ^^
Who does not want to travel anyway? Especially with the person you might be spending the rest of your life with?
Experiencing new things together or even doing old habits with someone you love is a happy feeling that probably can’t be paid by anything else.
Anyway, this is a already a lengthy entry…
…So for you, my dear friend, thank you for the inspiration, all the best to you and your SO! Hopefully after 2 years, I and Joe would be able to do the same… for now, I will await your travel blog entries. :)
Isa pang matabang #cat - si Coffee :) #singapore #roadhouse